February 2012
My days are so busy now...
Today went really, really well… Despite the fact that I got out of bed an hour after I needed to be up. I still had plenty of time to shower, get ready, eat breakfast, print out my materials, and make it on time to my presentation for some new clients.
The presentation took a lot longer than I thought it was going to because A) the median age of the realtor in the office is 60, B) only two...
January 2012
....
Now that I’m home, in bed, with my outfit for tomorrow picked out and my day all planned— I feel much better. It would be an absolute miracle if I had enough hot water/water pressure to take a nice long shower— but I’m not going to push my luck. The water is the only reason why I hate living in the barn. Well, that and my floors are always filthy.
I just had to change my...
If you need me, I'll be at my riding lesson.
I know how to make my day get better, I’ll just get on my horse.
meganislove-deactivated20120715 asked: I'm seriously having the hardest time understanding why he is being such an asshole. Like why isn't he at all sorry for all he's put you through? or maybe TRY to be nice so you don't get even MORE money from him? like I don't understand why he thinks being an absolute dick to a woman who loved him is the right thing to do?
ugh...
Today has been a little bit harder than I thought it would. I thought maybe it would be possible to wake up and be in a completely different frame of mind. Like last night’s anxiety would completely melt away and I’d be fine. No such luck, though…
I just go done with an hour long conversation with the soon-to-be. Talking to him is always rough. Especially with my emotional...
Monday Check in
Obsessing Over: Trying to be successful.
Working on: All of my marketing and advertising stuff, I have a presentation tomorrow.
Thinking About: Not hurting someone’s feelings… making sure that I’m honest to myself.
Anticipation: I wish he’d just file the stupid divorce papers already. But he won’t because he’s afraid of paying me alimony. I told him today,...
I got a new job!
It’s nothing to write home about… but it’s a job that pays at least $400 a month.
Cleaning a house.
Oh jeeze… whatever makes the money, right?
Also sort of hilarious, I’ve been asked to house sit for a family member for 10 days. They pay fantastically because their dog hates the kennel so much. I’d have to stay at their house. But it’s in a gated...
Can I sleep this feeling off?
I’m so anxious right now that I feel like my body is going to turn inside out. It’s the most awful feeling— something so indescribable.
I don’t know exactly why I’m feeling like this, but it probably has something to do with the fact that I’ve been going full speed ahead for the past six days without stopping. I have hardly been home; I’ve only slept here...
theinevitableadventure asked: Lol marry a rich man with a lot of horses so I can come out and see you. While I'm out there you can (reteach me) how to ride ;P Hahahah I miss you too Kikster!! Love ya lady :)
Anonymous asked: Sorry to break it to you, but you are in no way furthering the well-being of the breed by breeding halter horses. I have been at the world shows to compete in judging, and let me tell you I know that not the best balanced, strong in bone&conformation horses are winning... its the biggest ones that are. The appy is one breed that is quickly becoming another quarter horse with color which goes...
3 tags
Musical Obsessions of the Moment:
Rod Stewart
Lana Del Rey
Chaka Khan
Wynonna
Eagles
Weird combo. All excellent music.
Keeping Busy
Tonight is one of the only nights this week where I’ve spent the majority of it at my own apartment in the barn. I have Lifetime Movie Network on tv, I’m snuggled up under the covers and am playing my games. It’s relaxing to be by myself for once…
This weekend is going to be so busy. I’ve got to rest up for it!
Friday:
Breakfast
Laundry
Work out
Get check from...
I’m so incredibly exhausted…
Maybe it’s from my busy day, maybe it’s from riding and working out this afternoon. Maybe it’s because I’ve stayed up every nice I can recall in the past two weeks.
I got myself a gym membership today— score! Now all I have to do is go at least four days a week. I’m gonna kick ass!!!
Well, I better go to...
Today:
Go down to grandparents’ house: eat breakfast, file police report for grandma, do her hair.
Riding lesson at 10 am: today’s lesson was loping. But because I didn’t have my ball spurs on (yes, I’m that much of a rookie!), it was more like a lesson on stopping and backing up. I finally got her to lope around a few good times, though. We did well! Plus, C (my trainer) and I...
Hi new followers!
My name is Kiki.
I’m a novice equestrian living in 100 horse barn on a ranch in California. I’m going through some rough times right now, but with a little positivity— I’ll make it through!
I’d love to meet you! Put a message in my ask box and tell me a little about yourself, please!
Here’s to a new adventure…
5 tags
Breeding Halter Horses, a little breakdown
My family has been active in the Appaloosa Horse Club for over fifteen years. Before that, we were strictly American Quarter Horses, but chose to leave the breed for person reasons. However, at one time my uncle was even president of the AQHA.
After leaving the AQHA, my grandpa and uncle decided to go to the Appys solely because of the beauty of the breed. We love their color, history and...
3 tags
Excitingly Enough
I’ve made plans to go to San Francisco during the second week of February to go see Lana del Rey!!!!!
I’m in love with her music!
Blah
Being jolted out of a dead sleep by the urge to vomit is probably the most horrible thing ever, and a terrible way to start your day. No, ladies, I’m not talking about pregnancy either. I’m talking about my insane love affair with seaweed salad.
You see, I’m allergic to the green stuff. But I love it more than life itself. Something about the flavor and color just lures me in.
...
Note to self:
Eating a gallon of seaweed salad with sri racha sauce is never a good idea. TUMMY ACHE!
Getting into a Routine
The hardest thing about my transition to single womanhood has been getting into a good, well-rounded routine. I’m talking about that normal, every day schedule that you know you can fall back on daily— the kind where you are productive in every aspect of your life. Yeah, well, maybe not every aspect of your life, but most of them.
For the first two weeks I lived here, my number one...
Accomplished:
Sent out two email fliers for my customers
Mocked up another email flier
Sent out a “profile” to a potential client
Paid another $300 on my credit card bill
Went to Costco (bought myself a huge tub of seaweed salad)
Made our reservations for Friday
Made plans to go to Sacramento again tomorrow, for a job fair next Tuesday, and to the science museum in San Francisco next...
Where'd the morning go?
This rainy, blustery weather makes me feel like curling up in bed with a few movies and laying around all day. It doesn’t help that I stayed up until 2:30 in the morning watching movies with Schroeder, either.
Yesterday was our first time hanging out just the two of us. Usually Hillary is right there in the mix, which I really like because she acts as sort of a buffer. But, yesterday when...
From Ten Reasons Not To Sleep With A Poet
liberationarmy:
9. Poets expect grand gestures. To your own surprise, you will deliver such gestures. You will forsake other friends and lovers, and consider wearing on a chain around your neck a small gold vial of poet blood.
http://therumpus.net/2012/01/sunday-rumpus-fiction-ten-reasons-not-to-sleep-with-a-poet/
“May your hands always be busy, may your feet always be swift, May you have a...”
– (via rebirthofanewlife)
Getting Out
Last night, Brittney, Hillary, Schroeder and I went out.
You know the drill, we were all dressed up and in a party mood. We went to this tiny little bar in an even tinier town on the delta. We spent the next few hours dancing, drinking and doing a few shots. When it got boring, though, we drove back to the town that we came from to go to the little bar there.
Schroeder was our driver—...
Watch
1 tag
At least there is some positive...
I paid another $150 on my credit card today!
My meals for today were curtesy of my aunt.
I got to talk to an old friend today who reminded me that I am a poet and nothing less.
I wrote today.
The rain on my tin roof is such a beautiful sound.
The Worst Day
My eyes have that heavy, sticky feeling from crying so much today.
When I woke up this morning, I knew it was going to be an awful one. From the moment I set my feet on the ground, this day had it out for me. First, my hair and outfit wouldn’t cooperate. I looked like a shaggy street urchin, in my sweatshirt and undone fair with no mascara. Although, not wearing mascara was a genius plan...
Little things that Dis/Please Me
Displease:
1. My hair cam rout darker than I intended it to. Why did I have to add that 4IR? I should have stuck with my sixes… Oh well, it’s still winter and at least it will fade to a nice color.
2. I have to help get all the ewaste out of the barn today, which includes no less than five old TVs, a bunch of phones and fax machines, a couple vacuums, etc. I don’t want to get...
Yesterday was such a lovely day.
Nothing brilliant happened, in particular, it was just a nice day. I started it by eating a little breakfast and working on my marketing stuff at my grandmother’s house. Then, my Aunt and I drove to our favorite antique store in Roseville, where I bought the most perfect, adorable, tiny little magazine table for my apartment. It’s teal and it fits at...
Megan Renee: I'll give it a go →
meganislove:
Are looks important in a relationship?
Are relationships ever worth it?
Are you a virgin?
Are you in a relationship?
Are you in love?
Are you single this year?
Can you commit to one person?
Describe your crush:
Describe your perfect mate:
Do you believe in love at first sight?
Do…
Ask away!
How do I do this again?
For the past week or so, Schroeder has been texting me throughout the day. It starts off with an innocent “Good morning,” then the conversation gets more interesting from there. First off, Schroeder and I don’t know each other very well. We have a mutual friend, Hillary, who we’ve both been friends with for many years. We have met a few times, we just haven’t ever had...
“If they don’t need you, it’s okay. You do not live for other people.”
– Kyo (via chrysanthems)
To Do Tomorrow:
1. Facebook: clean out friends and liked pages
2. Haircut
3. Buy hair dye
4. Sync phone and finish downloading music
5. Clean out car (because I didn’t do it today!)
6. Putz around with Aunt (who is still acting mad at me…)
7. finish laundry
8. Deposit check
9. Call P and follow up
It's Been a While
There are times like this, like right now in the middle of an unexpected divorce, when a person remembers who she is. My identity literally walked up to me and smacked me in the face this weekend, like “Hey, you! Remember me? Yeah, you can be you again!”
I’m laughing more freely. I feel lighter when I walk. Music makes me cry, helps me cope, and provokes me thoughts again....
