Diary of a Divorcee

Please, let me sleep!

The dog, the temperature, the tv, the girls, my own thoughts— everything is preventing me from a good night’s rest.

I wish I had an on and off switch. But how would I turn my brain back on once I shut off? Deep, huh?

No, seriously, I’d rather be sleeping than crunching numbers and deciding whether I need another LeSportSac bag or a turquoise necklace. Or thinking about my husband and wondering if he’s been fed or if he’s bought me a surprise. Or wondering if I will get to go to any fun Independance day parties…

Come on sheep, start jumpin’! I’ll count you tonight afterall.

I say and text these words to my husband all the time. Even if it is only a day, I miss him. It doesn’t matter how long it is, missing him always the same feeling.

The word miss isn’t strong enough… There will never be an accurate word for the longing my heart experiences when we are apart.

Today I’m thankful for the smile that crosses my face when I think about my husband being only three hours away instead of across the country. :)

graceingray:

I am notpregnant.

IVF did not work.

I am not shocked at all but no matter how much I prepared myself for this outcome, there was no way I could have prepared for this kind of pain.

I am numb.

I am angry.

I am beyond sad.

In this moment I feel like I just wasted 2 months of my life for nothing.

I don’t know when this is going to get better or how it is going to get better but I am sure it is just going to take some time.

I’m going to do my damndest to not raise bratty children.

Yes, my family was always rich. We never wanted anything. But we wrent awful spoiled brats.

I’m with my cousins who at tine turn into gremlins. They get whatever they want, whenever they want. They don’t lift a finger at home. They turn evil as soon as they are told no. Most of the tine they are very sweet… I’m just at my wits end.

The forteen year old is driving me insane. The dog pooped on a pile of her dirty clothes and she refuses to pick it up because “she doesn’t do that, it’ll make her sick”.

I asked her nicely to clean it up, multiple times. I yelled. Her mom yelled. She still refuses and the poop is still on the floor. I’m just waiting for her to step in it.

And if you’re wondering why I’m not picking it up, it’s simple: Its the priciple.

I’m not going to do something for an ungrateful, thankless person who expects to be handed everything.

I know I can say a lot of things about the way I’m going to raise my children, but there’s a few things I know for sure. My kids will know respect.

there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home

After being across the country in California for the past two weeks, my husband is now riding on an airplane toward me.

At some point today my husband will fly over my head… I wish I could jump up there and hug him!

Then he’ll land somewhere in Louisiana and spend the next month sleeping in a fishing shack out in the islands.

I’ll sure miss him, but I don’t want to be there with him in one of those dinky shacks, full of bugs and humid as hell. Yuck!

I’ll stay in my hometown the whole time he’s gone. That means while my husband is out working his ass off I will be living the life— floating the river with friends, parties, sun bathing, hanging put and just having fun. Talk about feeling guilty!!

peasanndcarrots:

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Now this one is a hard decision. I’m stuck between two fantastic women that have talked me through a lot of things. Its either, Kristen or Kiki. I don’t think I could pick just one of them because they BOTH have changed my way of thinking. They are incredible women. I’m going to keep is simple right now because I’m not in the right mind set to write out something completely amazing. I just wanted to say thank you and you both are amazing!

When the dog seemingly fell into our lap we didn’t have to think very long about his name. All week my cousin had been talking about buying a horse named Cuervo, though unfortunately, he wasn’t for sale. Still, we wanted a Cuervo in the family…

As for the rest of the names, some are from the Lady Gaga sing “Alejandro”. Gomez was a name we rejected for his first name. All of our chihuahuas have Burrito as one of their middle names.

Then we will call him all sorts if silly things like Rooey, Bunnikins, Caputzie and Pitsie-Potsie.

If I end of taking him because their dogs don’t get along with him, I’m renaming him Francisco!

After well over a week of being in Mississippi, and travelling to Louisiana, I finally found toilet seat covers in a public bathroom.

Yesterday in a Walmart bathroom somewhere between Jackson and New Orleans we were graced with the disposable paper covers that give us peace of mind.

I don’t understand why they aren’t standard throughout the country… I think it has something to do, no offense, with the unimportance of hygiene in this area.

Now don’t rake me over the coals… All I am saying is, people here take care of themselves differently than back home. Missing teeth are so commonplace thar when you see a person with a full set you immediately notice.

I just wonder what the deal is….